Dec. 1st, 2005 We just did ‘WHAT’?

Theme: We just did ‘WHAT’?

The evening had started like most evenings, Jamie had laid against Nessa’s shoulder and talked about how she liked this boy with blue eyes and warm smiles. Nessa had just let her talk and then Cameron had joined their little party. The movie had ended and Nessa and Cameron had told Jamie she could spend the night on the couch, so she did not have to bike home alone. Jamie smiled, her soft dark curls framing her pale face, making her look like a little angel. Nessa gave Cameron a kiss and then asked him to get them some wine. “We don’t have anything to celebrate but our friendship, so we shall drink to that,” Cameron had gotten them the wine and had gotten himself a beer. He loved his girlfriend, but he hated the wine she drank and was much to content to give up his can of beer for that sweet gew as he liked to call it.

Later that evening, Jamie and Nessa had spoken about Jamie’s latest crush and it had gotten quite emotional. Nessa had tried to explain to her friend that she had to think before she acted, or she would get hurt time and time again. Jamie had heard this all before and found it difficult not to respond angrily, so she kept quiet. Then Cameron had refilled her glass and said, “You know, such a pretty girl like yourself, you should find a sweet boyfriend, who loves you and who does not see you as some prize,” Jamie had felt tears burn behind her eyes. He was not the type to hand out compliments, usually Cameron was tucked away in some comic book while the two girls chatted until they both felt too tired to stay upright. But now he seemed to try a different approach, sweet and warm, his comic book lay on the stack next to his chair and his deep brown eyes sought Jamie’s light brown. As if to emphasize his words he rose from his seat and sat down next to Jamie, on the other side of her. Nessa tapped her boyfriend on the leg and said, “I’m just going to get us some snacks, be right back,” and he nodded absently.

Jamie had doubted that glance, Nessa had gone off to the kitchen and Jamie felt Cameron’s hands move over her shoulder, stroking her arm and then stroking her hair. “You have the biggest bunch of curls I’ve ever seen on a girl,” he said, softly pulling a few strands and then watching as they bounced back to her head. Jamie blushed and said, “Thanks, you’re not too bad looking yourself,” Cameron had soft brown curls that came to just over his ears, he dared not go through them with a comb and Nessa hated him for it. It was the one thing she wanted to change about him, but if he did ever change it, Jamie knew that he would not be the same Cameron. He kissed her on the forehead and then rose from the couch, “I should go and see what Nessa is cooking up in that kitchen,” he said with a wink and then disappeared after his girlfriend. Jamie was left alone in the dim lit room, pondering over the strange feeling of affection she had received from him, Cameron had been Nessa’s boyfriend went the two girls met. He used to go out with the same group of friends they did and usually had to bike home with Jamie before taking Nessa home. Often enough, Jamie would spend the night at Nessa’s house, listening until late at the soft giggles coming from her friend’s bedroom.

Nessa had found her own place quite young and Cameron practically lived there, while Jamie liked the comfort of staying at her parent’s place for a bit more. She was in no rush to leave home and she could always crash at Nessa’s if need be. Nessa’s smiling face suddenly appeared around the corner of the door, “Come on, we’re going to sit in the bedroom,” Jamie looked puzzled but rose to meet her friend. Jamie was led to Nessa’s bedroom where the radio was playing soft tunes. “Cameron got the new album from Starsailor and he thought we should come listen,” Nessa explained. She had arranged a bunch of pillows all over the bed and lit some candles. It looked nice and cozy and for a moment, Jamie felt that she was the third wheel on the wagon when Cameron patted his hand on the bed and said, “Come on, join us, this album is very relaxed and I know you will like it,” Jamie nodded and took a large purple, fluffy pillow which she clutched in her arms as she settled on the bed. The music filled the air and for an entire soon they were all quiet and musing along with the music. Then the silence was broken, by a question that Jamie had never in her lifetime expected.

“Jamie, would you like to stay here tonight?” Nessa seemed to have turned a new color of crimson and Jamie chuckled as she replied, “Of course, I love your couch way better than my own bed,” when Cameron stroked her arm and said, “No, she means here, in the bed,” and Jamie swallowed. The candle light was making his eyes lit up and warmly and Nessa had always been her best friend, beautiful and always the one to attract the men’s eyes. Her short cropped blonde red hair and those tiny freckles over her nose made Jamie think of summers in Spain, with sunshine and sand castles. “Oh…ok,” she said and mused on about the warmth of summer, not truly grasping what was going on. “Good,” they said in nuisance and then chuckled. Jamie looked over them both and said, “What?” and was handed another glass of the rose wine. “I have asked Cameron if we could invite you to our bed, we have talked about a third person and we would not feel comfortable with someone we did not know,” Nessa began and then gulped down the entire glass of wine. Cameron was silent, just watching Jamie and smiling sullenly. Jamie took another swig, so as not to have to say anything and then said, “Me?” and felt Cameron scoot closer to her. “Yeah, you are sweet and you’re our friend. Our beautiful friend,” he said and pulled a strand of her curls back. Nessa smiled and said, “It’s ok, only if you want to,” and Jamie nodded slowly. She wanted to think and yet she just wanted to let go of all thought and enjoy this special attraction the three of them had.

The music, the candles, the wine, it was uncertain what she could blame first but for some reason, Jamie agreed to try and stay with them. She knew that if it became uncomfortable or weird she could end it, they were her friends after all. Jamie’s clothes were simple for the evening, a jeans and a tight black shirt, her socks had a picture of Pucca on them kissing her ninja friend and for a moment Jamie stared at the image before pulling them off. She curled her feet under the blanket and stared down at her jeans buttons for a few long moments, Cameron had begun by taking off his shirt and she took a peek at his boy. He was slender, tall and a bit muscular, then he stroked her and told her all would be alright. From there on, Cameron started to kiss Nessa, who pulled of her own shirt and as she was wearing a skirt, showed most skin of all three of them in no time. She then curled up next to Jamie and began kissing her softly on the lips, the cheeks and then back on her lips. Jamie could feel her tongue moving towards Nessa’s and she smiled. Nessa pulled back and said, “Not much different from a guy kissing, is it?” and Jamie nodded. Next it was Cameron who kissed her and Jamie felt aroused from the way her lips moved over his, from the way his fingers rolled down her bare skin and how he pulled the shirt over her head.

That night they spent together was a blur to Jamie, who felt all these new emotions roll over her as if they were the most normal feelings in the world. She kissed Cameron, she kissed Nessa, she was kissed by one when the other was touching her and stroking her. She felt good and gave that feeling to her friends until the three of them fell asleep. It had all been so fuzzy and warm, that Jamie wondered if it had indeed been a real experience. When they all woke up, Jamie slipped into a t-shirt and was about to step into the shower when she heard footsteps come up behind her. Cameron had followed her from the bed and his hand was stroking her hair. “Such lovely curls,” he said and kissed her softly on the lips when a scream evaporated that warmth. He stepped back as Nessa came in between them, screaming and crying. “Last night was a one time thing Cameron, I am still your girlfriend!” she called out at him and then turned to Jamie, “He is mine, get your own boyfriend,” Jamie stood there, pale as a sheet and trying to catch her breath. “I just wanted to take a shower,” she stammered and Nessa jumped on it, “You wanted to shower with my boyfriend.” Jamie shook her head, “No, no, that’s not what happened…”she said and felt oddly unstable on her feet. What had changed so all of a sudden? Was it not Nessa who had asked her to spend the night with them? Had it not been Nessa who had comforted her and told her it was alright? Jamie shook her head and said, “Fine, I’ll be going then.” She took her clothes from the bedroom and dressed quickly. Then ran out of the house without saying another word.

On her bike she pulled out her earplugs and turned her I-pod on as loud as she could. The singer of System of a Down was raging about all the injustice in the world. Well, what about the injustice that happens in friendship? What have we done? She asked herself and cried as she biked home, confused, lost and not sure if she still had those close friends she had had before they had spent that night together. Crying, what had they done?